" zzzzz.....Wha??? Where am I? !!!
"Why can't I move..........or talk??
"I can only hear my words as thoughts in my..head?"

"AHHHH! who are those giant women and why are they stareing....at me?"


" Here, let me move these off the hook so you can hang him way in the back"

"It's a good thing I had just bought some eyeliner, You glued the package so carefully no one would suspect it had ever been opened!"

"Yep, he looks like the real thing in there, I'll bet he's going to hang on this peg for weeks till some chick buys him"

"GOOD!, then he'll have plenty of time to think about how he dated us both at the same time! I hope he feels remorse before he gets all used up"

"Who cares! The thought of our ex boyfreind serving a woman to the point of extinction and living his last weeks laying with all the other girly crap she carries in her purse..well, It's gonna keep a smile on my face!"

"LOL! you are SO evil!"



"So how do feel now TUFF GUY?? Hmmmm? Still think yelling at the sales girl is a good idea? Let's see how six months as a frilly pink angora sweater changes your opinion...and By The Way? I start a new job in another state next week, so you better hope the next girl they hire is a witch as well..or you may NEVER change back!"


..."Ugh! there! Finally! I've managed to move! Ugh! If I push a little more...UGH! Ah! I'm Hanging off the edge...If I could get to the floor I could...??"

"(Sigh) ..if I got to the floor I'd be a pair of womens jeans on the floor... In this state, what would i do? where would I go?"

"I thought she'd change me back by now but it's been months...sob!....She's NEVER changing me back is she?"


"That's it Gina, just put him on the rack and walk away"
"But won't everyone who see's him think he's just a shoe?"
"He IS a shoe..now."
"But once he was a man, THIS MORNING he was a man"
"You know? shoes usually come in pairs... you want to join him up there on the rack?"
"GULP! no mam!"

" Jenny! It's me! "
"Paul???? this bottle of nail polish sounds like Paul"
" I am PAUL! "
"But how?"
"That wish you made when we saw the first star in the sky the other night..."
"I wished it would be easy for us to be together"
"And now you can put me in your pocket! This is awful!!! Change me back!!!!"
"But I don't know how!"
Close To Clacking Open Slingbacks_Trailer

see what it's like to be a shoe? Are you getting it now?
"ONE SIDED LOVE"
A tragedy by Squidonhead






Dont ever make a wish without thinking about it first, sigh.
Once I was a man and now I'm a decreped old doll of a woman- NOT EVEN A PRETTY DOLL!

It all started when a girl I knew from the office got assigned the cubicle next to mine. We would say hello and do things coworkers do like lend each other paper clips or some printer paper.

Aside from that we never spoke.

The problem was that I thought she was super cute. I would go home at night and dream of her. When i took my meals I would find myself wondering about what kinds of things she liked to eat. When I went to movies i would wonder what films she enjoyed...I had it bad.

Weeks went by and I found myself trying to come up with ways to engade her in conversation. Each time I would work up the nerve I'd make eye contact..and get all tounge tied. I was a wreck! My work began to suffer, I stopped sleeping and worst of all , I think she was starting to think I was really weird. A stalker level threat if you know what I mean. I suppose I couldnt blame her.

One night soon after I had come to my realization that she was scared of me a fateful thing happened.

I looked up at the sky on my walk home, and saw a beautiful shooting star. Without thinking I closed my eyes and wished that I could become what she wanted most.

I felt my entire body go electric. I stiffened up and was bolted into accelerated walking I couldnt cointrol. My feet moved fopward without my brain telling them to take steps. I walked for what must have been miles through neighborhoods I didnt know.

Eventually I came to a building I had never seen. As I past the row of trash cans alongside it my right hand reached out and grabbed a cardboard television box that had been discarded.

I walked up the steps and the front door miraculously unlocked and flew open. I entered and started up a fight of steps hearing the front door close and latch behind.

On the fouth floor I left the stairwell and walked to apartment 7C. Once again the door flew open and i was driven inside. The light snapped on and I could see I was standing in a feminine apartment. I could tell it was a womans place because it was decorated. A nice couch with matching end tables, Flowers displayed in Vases. That sort of thing.

The apartment door closed and locked itself and I was pushed on into a bedroom. Here I could see the Lacey bed covers, the open closet full of dresses, perfume bottles on the dresser top.

The electric feeling throughout my body intensified. I saw a white light surround me as well as my clothing melting away . The box i carried seemed to suddenly grow and exiend over and around my nakedness. It was freakin WEIRD!

All went dark and I couldnt feel my body any longer. I was thinking, but not feeling any physical sensation. I stayed in the dark like that for hours and hours. I thought I may be dead.

I eventually thought I may be insane, especially when I heard the muffled sound of her voice. It sounded like she was on the phone talking.."Well thanks sis! I cant wait to open it!" I heard her say. I heard ripping paper, and saw light again..and the face of my beloved coworker ..only ..she was now a giant!

"OH MY GOSH!" she screamed with deilght! A Junior Miss from 1964!

I had become what she most desired. Somehow that star's magic remaid me in the image of the doll she had been seeking to complete her collection. Indeed, seconds later she walked me into her den and I could see the dozens of other dolls I was destined to join in her pretty display case.

I'm not sure how her sister was involved, I gathered it was her sister who had dropped the birthday present in the bedroom hours before my wish . Some how the magic made her story and my being there all make sense.

Circumstance is odd. As her doll I'll be treasured by her for the rest of her life..sigh..I guess thats not so bad..is it?

Marie in Macy's shoe shop

Just imagine yourself somewhere in here!
"But Jerry darling, I changed you so I could speak to you when ever I wanted and so I could always know where you were"

" So you made me a Cell Phone?"

"It's perfect isnt it? Anyone who sees me will think I'm in a phone conversation - and when we're done you go right back in my purse, safe and sound!"

" This is crazy! You have to let me go!"

" DONT MAKE ME HANG UP ON YOU JERRY!"

"The shoot is supposed to have FOUR tote bags, it looks like we're missing the white one"
"So? What do you want me to do about it?"
"I'm changing you into a white tote so I can finnish this photography job TODAY"
"But I dont want to be a handbag!"
"Pfft! Like you have a choice? you've already drank the potion, I put it in your soda can an hour ago"

" OWWWWWWWWW!" "giggle" "OW!" " giggle" "OWWWWWWWW!" " giggle"
"Look Paul, you were a nice guy and all, but too klingy! I need my space and you never let me have any."
"I tried to break up with you the normal way but you kept coming back and I've just had it."
"I hope you grow to like being a pair of women's jeans. You'll be expected to be klingy!"
"As soon as your hung up on this rack it's good bye for good!"

"Jeez ! I broke the heel off my transformed ex boyfreind Marco and now the spell to change him back isnt working."


"And your going to stay as my freakin pocketbook for as long as i freakin say so get used to it"

"Heh heh! He looks so real! Just like a Prada, and not a knock off either"

"The thing I'm liking best is that he has to look up at us..Cause he's my freakin pretty little girlie purse and he's all filled up with my stuff and hes gonna hang from my elbow and match my freakin high heeled shoes!"



"yeah, yeah, yeah...you dont deserve this, you have a life , blah blah blah.

Here's how it is, I changed you into a green silk stocking to match this outfit I'm going to put on in a sec. Your going to spend the evening wraped around my left leg and then you'll probably spend a few months in one of my drawers till i need you again. Oh..just to let you know? this is like the first time ive worn green stockings since i was a kid in a Christmas pagent.. so i hope you dont hate small enclosed spaces."